All the clear red flags ignored from "The Tinder Swindler" and ones you should look for when online dating in general
When it comes to red flags some people can be color blind and miss all the signs in the name of love.
No better example comes to mind than the 3 women who were unfortunately swindled out of thousands of dollars by a certain Simon Leviev aka Tinder Swindler.
Though some of their friends advised them to proceed with caution and really consider the circumstances of who they were dating (*cough* 1st victim Norweigan Cecilie Fjellhoy) as is the case when in love our judgment can be sometimes clouded.
Here are all the clear red flags the women breezed by which led them to, unfortunately, being scammed and ones you should look out for as well.
1. Meeting immediately after 1 day
Stranger danger is a thing for a reason.
In all seriousness though, with so much competition on dating apps, it can be hard to stand out and get someone's attention with all the competition. For this reason, it can be pretty common to move things from virtual to in-person meetup fast.
But it is important for security reasons and because you just don't really know someone's intentions to talk for a few days before agreeing to meet in person.
You really can't tell much from a person in just a day even if the chemistry through text is phenomenal from the jump.
2. Over the top first date
Both Cecilie Fjellhoy and Ayleen Charlotte scammed by Shimon Hayut were taken to a 5-star hotel as a first date. This was necessary to push his image of a rich man and buy into his luxurious lifestyle.
In reality, even if doing something special for a first date is nice, the 1st time you meet a match it is nothing more than just an introduction to one another. Testing the physical chemistry and getting to know each other better.
There is no relationship set until speaking and connecting therefore pulling out all the stops to impress with a fancy display isn't necessary.
As a matter of, fact going over the top can show an over-investment in a relationship that hasn't even been established yet or plain and simple being with a show-off, both of which should raise an alarm.
3. Pay ... I mean Pen pal
Asking for money was the most obvious red flag every viewer of the true-crime doc noticed immediately. It started with a few small amounts and then increased astronomically with the debt for one of the women being way over 100k.
Once the money was sent he would establish a pen-pal sort of relationship and rarely spend time with his victims in person.
No need to repeat this but don't give money to strangers, especially not credit card information.
When it comes to personal finance that should be top secret at least in the beginning.
As baffling as it is that the women just dished out their credit card information, Shimon Hayut mastered the following red flag to get his "loans" with ease.
4. Emotional manipulation and Love Bombing
Everyone (or most people) I should say want to be loved and given affection/feel valued. But there can be point where some use these measures of displaying love to an extreme and weaponize it to take advantage of a person through their emotions.
The Tinder Swindler was a master at this from the good morning texts to the gifts he would say whatever was music to the victims' ears all for them to let their guard down.
After some time when the women were locked in, he would ask for some "favors", drop the affectionate act to get what he needs.
When it comes to a situation with your match that you are not comfortable with and they don't take no for an answer or insist on it that can be a problem.
"Wanting to be your forever" or "Just checking on you" (but constantly asking where someone is) can be more sinister than just showing love.
5. Legal documentation
Much like your wallet in flag #3, there is no reason why a match should have your passport, driver's license, or any other form of legal documentation for that matter for your safety.
After finding out about Shimon's scam victims Cecilie Fjellhoy, Pernilla Sjoholm, and Ayleen Charlotte were terrified of what he could do to them because he knew so much of their information.
The only thing that could've made it worse is if they had given him their social security # and that's kinda surprising with how giving they were like Oprah back in the day but thankfully at least that wasn't provided.
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